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Written by: Andy Reaser & Doug E. Jones
Transcribed by: Shay Fitzpatrick
Season 7, Episode 17
Episode Number: 151
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Piper and Leo walk in. Leo has his hand covering Piper's eyes.]
Leo: Ready? Surprise!
(He takes away his hand and Piper looks around the room. It is all neat and tidy.)
Leo: Isn't it great?
Piper: It's... it's something.
Leo: You hate it.
Piper: No, no. I don't hate anything. It's just... The dining room and then the living room and, you know, when you rearranged the kitchen... I did kinda hate that.
Leo: Piper, you're always complaining about what a mess it is.
Piper: Yeah, I know, but it's an attic, and it's supposed to be messy. Sweetie, it's not that I don't appreciate you helping around the house, because I do. It's just... it's just a little much.
Leo: Well, you know, I just shuffled some things around.
Piper: Shuffled? You call this shuffling? Honey, you built things. You hung things. You bagged things. (She picks up a small bag off the shelf.) I mean, what is this?
Leo: Those are corks. You know, for the potion bottles. You leave 'em out and they get brittle.
Piper: And that doesn't seem like overkill to you?
(She goes to put the bag down and Leo clears his throat. She puts the bag back on the shelf.)
Leo: I'm just trying to help.
Piper: I know, honey, and that's very sweet. But, you know, I kinda liked the attic messy. At least I knew where everything was. (She sees a dollhouse that looks exactly like the manor.) Where did you find that?
Leo: Under some blankets. Why?
Piper: I just... I haven't seen it in years. Is it wet?
Leo: Well, it needed some touch-ups.
Piper: Have you gone crazy again?
Leo: Look, this isn't easy for me.
Piper: I know, sweetie. I know. You've been a Whitelighter, an Elder, an Avatar...
Leo: Don't remind me.
Piper: The point is, if it's magical, you've done it. So it's not gonna be easy to adjust to life without powers overnight. And tackling all these projects is... a little obsessive.
Leo: Well, what am I supposed to do? I can't orb. I can't go to the Elders for information. I just want to fit in.
Piper: I know. But brittle corks?
Leo: Okay, I guess maybe that was a little much.
Piper: Look, there is no how-to book on this, okay? But we're gonna get through it. Together. Besides, this is what we wanted. Normal.
Leo: I guess I didn't expect normal to be so hard.
Piper: Well, you can't force it. And you don't need to. We've got plenty of time.
(They hug. A demon appears in the attic.)
(The demon throws a boomerang-like object at them. Leo pushes Piper out of the way. The boomerang cuts Leo's arm.)
Piper: Oh, no, you don't.
(Piper tries to blow him up but he disappears before she can.)
Leo: Still think we've got plenty of time?
[Cut to the underworld. Cave. Zankou is standing in the dark. The demon appears.]
Zankou: Did you wound him?
'Craven': Just as you've instructed.
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Leo is flipping through the Book of Shadows. He is holding the boomerang. Piper walks in.]
Piper: What are you doing?
Leo: Trying to ID the demon.
Piper: That's not what I mean. Why aren't you sitting down? You got hit.
Leo: Yeah, but it's just a scratch. I think this crescent might be tribal.
Piper: You're not listening to me. You're not vanquishing anybody.
Leo: Why not?
Piper: Well, for one thing, you can't self-heal anymore. Hunting demons is too dangerous.
Leo: Okay, well, you can't self-heal either and it doesn't stop you.
Piper: Yeah, but I can blow things up.
Leo: Yeah, I noticed.
Leo: Look, I don't know why you're making a big deal out of it.
Piper: A demon tried to kill you.
Leo: Okay, but demons try to kill us almost every week. What do you want me to do, hide in Magic School?
Piper: It's a thought.
Leo: I was kidding.
Piper: Well, I'm not. Look, it's great that you gave up your powers to be with us and everything, but things are gonna have to change. You've only got one life to live and I'd like you to start taking care of it.
Leo: Okay. Well, I didn't become a mortal to go run and hide. I'm staying put.
Piper: Leo, please...
Leo: I've made up my mind. (Piper presses a cloth against his wound.) Ow.
Piper: Well, I have to clean it, don't I?
(Wyatt is standing at the doorway.)
Leo: Hey, little guy. (Leo goes over to him.) Hey, hey. Look, see? It's just a scratch, okay? It's nothing.
(Leo hugs him.)
[Scene: Magic School. Paige's Office. Paige is spinning around on her desk chair.]
Paige: Oh, come on, come on. Advanced magical orbing. Tuesdays or Thursdays?
(Piper walks in holding the boomerang.)
Paige: Exactly what I need. Would you please throw that at the calendar?
Piper: What? No! Look, a demon...
Paige: You don't understand. I've been doing schedules all week and I'm going insane. That's exactly what I need to make decisions. Would you please throw it? Throw it?
(Piper throws the boomerang and it lands on a calendar behind Paige. Paige looks at the calendar.)
Paige: Fridays! Brilliant.
Piper: I'm glad to see the future of magic is in such capable hands.
Paige: Just trying to keep things lively. What's up?
Piper: A demon attacked Leo.
Paige: What? Is he okay?
Piper: He's fine. But I need you to scry with that thing and then vanquish the demon. I'd do it myself, but I have to get home and protect Leo.
Paige: Why didn't you just bring him here?
Piper: He's being stubborn. So I had to set some crystals to keep him safe.
Paige: He let you do this?
Piper: He doesn't know.
Paige: I think there's something you're not telling me, missy.
Piper: Leo and I are just having a little trouble adjusting to him being human again.
Paige: That would be a big adjustment. We are also gonna have to adjust to the fact that he can't heal us anymore.
Piper: Or himself. And I don't wanna keep forcing Wyatt to tap into his powers before he's ready.
Paige: Why not? He healed you before.
Piper: Yeah, with some help. But we can't keep traumatizing him like that. We've got to find another way. So, you can handle all this?
Piper: You might wanna call Phoebe. That thing is probably from some sort of tribe.
Paige: Got it. All over it.
Piper: Thanks for the help.
[Scene: Underworld. Cave. Zankou and a tribe of demons are there.]
'Craven': I have assembled my fiercest warriors.
Zankou: They better be as capable as you claim. The Charmed Ones will be here soon.
'Craven': The Charmed Ones... are coming here?
Zankou: As soon as they scry with your crescent. Why do you think I told you to leave it behind?
'Craven': So you're luring them into a trap... to destroy them.
Zankou: You think you can destroy them with one small tribe? No wonder demons always perish at the hands of those witches.
'Craven': Well, then what exactly is your plan?
Zankou: Your troops and I are gonna keep them busy while you return to the manor to locate the spiritual Nexus and with it... the Shadow.
'Craven': No demon has been able to harness the power of the Shadow before.
Zankou: Don't get ahead of yourself, Craven. You're only gonna find the Nexus. You won't have time for anything else.
Craven: And you're sure no one will be home?
Zankou: That's why you wounded their former Whitelighter. If I know these witches, and I do, they're gonna strike back with the full power of three. But they won't do that unless Leo is somewhere safe. So, yes, the manor will be empty.
Craven: Well, you see, I only ask because it seems that those that help you don't always... survive.
Zankou: But you attacked at their home and lived. Few can boast that. Take your positions. We're about to have company.
[Scene: The Bay Mirror. Phoebe's Office. Phoebe is sitting at her desk working.]
Phoebe: Split infinitive, I don't think so. (Paige orbs in.) You know, you should really call before you do that.
Paige: A demon attacked Leo and Piper wants us to take him out.
Phoebe: Think you have enough potion?
Paige: Better safe than sorry. Come on, we should go.
Phoebe: Why do you seem excited about this?
Paige: Well, because we need to protect our brother-in-law, and because we should make a statement. Because I'm really cooped up in Magic School.
Phoebe: All right, let me just go tell Elise. (Phoebe walks out of her office.) Hey, boss, column's done. I'll see you tomorrow.
Elise: Oh, no, you don't. This time I've got a family emergency, which means I need you to get the evening edition out.
Phoebe: Wait, wait, wait, wait. What? What about Dillard? Isn't he your number two guy?
Elise: Richard's out sick.
Phoebe: Okay, but I'm just an advice columnist. Surely you're skipping some rungs on the ladder here.
Elise: Don't sell yourself short, Phoebe. I have faith in you. Besides, you owe me. Think of the times I've covered for your family emergencies.
Phoebe: Yeah, but that's different.
Elise: How so?
Phoebe: Because they were my emergencies.
Elise: So your life is more important than mine?
Phoebe: No, that's not what I meant.
Elise: Good. I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job.
(Elise leaves. A man walks up to Phoebe.)
Tom: Phoebe. Just who I was looking for.
Phoebe: Who are you?
Tom: Tom Taylor, copy editor. Listen, I gotta cut Bauer's column to 1500 words and he's threatened to kill me.
Phoebe: Gimme a sec.
(Another man walks up to her.)
Man: Excuse me, Phoebe. Elise said I should talk to you.
Man: Yeah, it seems we've oversold an ad space.
Phoebe: Well, okay. Elise...
Woman: Excuse me.
(Everyone gathers around Phoebe. Paige gives her a look.)
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Leo and Wyatt are playing with the dollhouse. Chris is in his playpen nearby.]
Leo: That's the attic. Good. That's where we are right now. What's this right here? That's mummy and daddy's room, right. Yeah.
(Piper walks in.)
Piper: Everything all right?
Leo: Yeah. Yeah, why wouldn't it be?
Piper: Well, you know, seeing as how a demon tried to k-i-l-l you.
Leo: Right. Well, I'm fine.
Piper: Why are you so defensive?
Leo: I don't know. I guess maybe I feel like I have something to prove.
Piper: Leo, I was just trying to protect you.
Leo: I know, but you don't need to.
Piper: Yeah, obviously I do.
(Piper walks away.)
Leo: Piper, wait. Okay, me and mummy have to have a grown-up conversation, okay? I'll be right back.
[Scene: Underworld. Cave. Paige and Phoebe orb in.]
Phoebe: Okay, we have ten minutes. What? I told 'em I'd be right back.
Paige: Well, it's gonna take what it's gonna take.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, but I have a deadline. Do you know how much work goes into one edition? I can't believe Elise just dropped...
Phoebe: Okay. So now what do we do?
Paige: Ahh.. I don't know.
(Zankou flames in.)
Phoebe: Zankou. What are you doing here? Paige, what is he doing here?
Paige: How am I supposed to know?
Zankou: Where's your, uh, other sister, Piper?
Paige: Why do you want to know?
Zankou: I have my reasons.
Phoebe: Okay, look, you know, we'd love to stay and chat, but we have business that we need to attend to.
Zankou: I know.
(He clicks his fingers and the tribe of demons appear behind him.)
Paige: ...take longer than ten minutes.
(Paige throws the potion.)
[Scene: Manor. Bottom of the stairs. Piper is adding water to a vase of flowers. Leo comes down the stairs.]
Leo: Why are you so mad at me?
Piper: Because you're gonna get yourself killed, that's why.
Leo: Okay, well, I-I can... I can handle myself.
Piper: Really? The way you handled yourself this morning?
Leo: Yeah, uh, you know, I could have handled that.
Leo: Oh, you know, I-I would have thought of something.
Piper: Well, I'm so glad you would've thought of something. Now I don't have to worry.
Leo: Okay, it was good that you were there. But that doesn't give you the right to hide crystals behind my back.
Piper: I was just trying to protect you.
Leo: Well, I'm supposed to protect you.
Piper: Is that what all this is about?
Leo: It's part of it. It's my instinct to protect you, Piper. The reason I don't hide from demons is because I've never had to.
Piper: I realize that.
Leo: Okay. Well, Wyatt doesn't. And now he's seen me get hurt, and I don't want that to hurt him.
Piper: Okay, look, we are going to get through this.
Leo: I know we are. But you, yourself, said it was gonna take time. Which means, I'm gonna make mistakes. Okay, and when I do, I need you to be supportive. You know, not drown plants.
Piper: Well, I guess we all have our own ways of dealing with things.
Leo: Guess so.
(Three demons from the tribe appear. They're surprised to see Piper and Leo.)
Demon: What are you doing here?
(Piper blows up two of them. Craven runs away.)
Leo: Dining room.
Piper: I see where he went. Stay here.
(Piper walks through the house. So does Leo.)
Leo: Wyatt. (Leo sees Wyatt on the stairs.) Wyatt, get upstairs.
(Craven throws the boomerang at Leo and it hits him in the shoulder.)
Piper: Leo! (Piper finds Craven and tries to blow him up. He disappears. Piper goes over to Leo.) Leo? Are you okay?
Leo: Yeah. No. Don't let Wyatt see.
Piper: Honey, why don't you go upstairs?
Leo: Mommy and daddy are fine.
Piper: Sweetie, what's the matter? What is he doing?
(Suddenly Piper and Leo disappear. Wyatt orbs out.)
[Cut to the attic. Wyatt orbs in. A miniature Piper and Leo appear in the dollhouse.]
Leo: What just happened?
[Scene: Underworld. Cave. Phoebe and Paige hide behind a wall.]
Phoebe: Why is he doing this? And why now? I have a paper to put out.
Paige: Oh, I'm sure that factored into his decision making process.
Phoebe: I don't understand. How'd we go from a demon attacking Leo to Zankou attacking us?
Paige: Maybe because Leo's mortal, he's making his move.
Zankou: Don't be shy, ladies. You knew this day would come.
Paige: (to Phoebe) Take one of these.
(She hands Phoebe a potion.)
Phoebe: We have to get back to Piper, and I have to get back to work.
Paige: I wanna let him know we're in the game.
(Craven appears beside Zankou.)
'Craven': One sister is still at the manor.
Zankou: I know. I have the other two pinned down.
(Phoebe's phone starts ringing.)
Paige: Will you turn that freaking thing off?
Phoebe: I'm sorry, but you gotta admire the range. We're in the underworld. That's pretty good.
Zankou: You're making this too easy.
(Zankou follows the noise of the phone. He turns the corner where they were hiding and finds the phone on the ground. He crushes it with his foot.)
Phoebe: Looking for us?
(The demons turn around and Phoebe and Paige throw the potions at Zankou. He deflects them and they hit the demons, vanquishing them.)
Zankou: You missed.
Paige: Okay, that's our cue.
(Paige orbs out with Phoebe.)
Craven: So much for your plan.
Zankou: Gather the remaining tribe. This may still work.
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Wyatt is sitting beside the dollhouse, playing. Piper and Leo are looking out the window of the dollhouse.]
Piper: Wyatt. You need to make mummy and daddy big again.
Leo: Maybe he can't hear us.
(Piper touches the window and it zaps her.)
Leo: What happened?
Piper: I don't know. I think Wyatt put some kind of force field on the dollhouse. Wyatt! Let us out of here.
Leo: Yeah, w-we know you're only trying to help, but daddy needs to get to the hospital.
Piper: Shhh, you're just gonna scare him. That's probably why he put us in here in the first place, to protect us.
Leo: Great. We're supposed to be protecting him.
Piper: Okay. Let me handle Wyatt. This requires a mother's touch. WYATT MATTHEW HALLIWELL! You will stop this nonsense right now!
Leo: Wow. First time you used his full name.
Piper: It sounds better when I'm scolding him.
Leo: I don't think he understands what's going on. All he knows is a demon tried to kill dad. Again.
Piper: I don't understand why anyone would attack you. It's not like you're a threat to anyone anymore.
Leo: What I don't understand is how a demon thinks the house would be empty.
(Leo lays down on the couch.)
Piper: Well we're not gonna figure out anything from inside here.
Leo: At least the furniture is comfortable. You know, for toy furniture. Where'd you get this dollhouse anyway?
Piper: Grams made it.
Leo: She made it?
Piper: I didn't know she was a witch back then. So, obviously, she used some sort of magic. It's pretty perfect. (She turns on the light switch but nothing happens.) Almost perfect.
(They hear footsteps.)
Leo: What's that?
[Cut to the attic. Paige walks in.]
Paige: Wyatt and Chris, what are you doing up here?
Piper: (from dollhouse) Paige! Paige, down here!
Paige: Where's your mommy and daddy? Huh? Saw what happened downstairs. Okay. (Piper tries to blow up the window but she is knocked backwards and lands on a coffee table. She groans.) All right, babies, we're gonna go to magic school until we can figure out what happened.
(Paige orbs out with Wyatt and Chris.)
[Cut to inside the dollhouse. Piper sighs.]
Piper: I see he's just as stubborn as someone else I know.
[Scene: Underworld. Cave. Zankou is standing there with his eyes closed. The tribe of demons walk up to him.]
Zankou: The house is clear.
(Craven touches his wound.)
Craven: That's what you said last time.
Zankou: A slight miscalculation. But the plan was to get 'em out of the manor, and they are. Probably circling their broomsticks in magic school.
Craven: So I'm going back for the Nexus?
Zankou: Except this time I'm coming with you. Follow me.
(Zankou flames out.)
[Cut to the manor. Parlor. Zankou flames in. The tribe of demons appear.]
Zankou: The Charmed Ones' ancestral home.
Craven: How do we know this isn't a trap?
Zankou: We don't. That's why I asked for reinforcement. Give the command.
Craven: Spread out. Find the Nexus.
[Cut to the attic. Dollhouse.]
Piper: How are we gonna get out of here?
Leo: We can't. It's useless.
Piper: That's all you've got for me? We're just supposed to sit here and do nothing while you bleed to death on the couch?
Leo: What do you want me to say? I can't self-heal anymore. Without a doctor...
Piper: You used to be a doctor.
Leo: Yeah, like sixty years ago.
Piper: Well, start acting like one! Come on, Leo, you have to stop focusing on what you can't do, and think about what you can do. Come on, improvise!
Leo: All right. Grams used to like to sew, right?
Piper: Oh, Wyatt's bedroom used to be her sewing room. Why?
[Time lapse. Wyatt's room. Inside the room is clothes and an old sewing machine. Piper and Leo walk in.]
Piper: Okay... Now what?
Leo: Needle and thread.
Piper: Excuse me?
Leo: Don't worry, I'll walk you through it.
Piper: Walk me through what? Oh, no. No, no, no.
Leo: You're the one who said improvise.
Piper: Well, since when does anybody listen to me?
Leo: You can do this, Piper. Let's prove to Wyatt we can handle whatever's thrown at us. (Leo takes off his shirt.) All right, pull the skin together and stitch it through.
Piper: Sure. Easy for you to say.
Leo: I'm ready. Do it.
Piper: Are you sure?
(Piper starts to stitch up his wound. He groans.)
[Scene: The Bay Mirror. Phoebe is on the phone.]
Phoebe: Where have you been? I've been trying to reach you all day!
Elise's Voice: That's funny, I've been trying to avoid you all day.
Phoebe: That's a good one. Listen, I need to get out of here because there's a crisis at home.
Elise: It's always life and death with you Halliwells.
Man's Voice: Can I freshen up those drinks?
Phoebe: Drinks? What drinks?
Elise: Yes, thank you.
Phoebe: Wait a minute. What exactly did you say your emergency was?
Elise: I didn't. I'm so sorry about that, Richard.
(Elise hangs up. Two men walk up to Phoebe.)
Man #1: This moron's trying to take a butcher knife to my column!
Phoebe: Okay, what seems to be the problem? Oh, obviously, besides the butcher knife.
Man #2: Phoebe, it's a great story. Really, it is. It's just a bit bloated.
Man #1: Bloated? I'll show you bloated!
(He rolls up his sleeves.)
Phoebe: No, no, you know what? Please Please Please don't.
Man #1: Look, lady. I've been working the beat in this town for 22 years. And no Ivy League Trust Funder is gonna tell me how to write the news!
Phoebe: You know...
(Another man walks up to them.)
Man #3: Fashion editor. Sorry to interrupt, but our so-called film critic has been drinking coffee out of my teacup.
Man #4: Yeah, I don't know what Jordan's all worked up about, it's a two and a half star coffee mug... at best.
(Paige walks in.)
Paige: Phoebe, we gotta go.
Phoebe: Yeah, I know, I know. I wanna get Zankou as much as you do. Where's Piper?
Paige: That's the problem. Piper and Leo have vanished.
Phoebe: What do you mean? The boys?
Paige: The boys are fine. We have to find their parents.
Phoebe: (to the men) Let me ask you a question. Do we ever push the deadline for the evening edition?
Man #1: No. Then it'd be the "sometime in the middle of the night" edition.
Phoebe: All right, you know what? I'm gonna go into my office for a very important conference call. No interruptions!
(Phoebe and Paige walk into Phoebe's office and close the door behind them. They orb out.)
[Cut to the manor. Foyer. Phoebe and Paige orb in. They see the demons.]
Paige: Oh, goodness.
Phoebe: Hope you got a discount on all that leather.
(Zankou walks in.)
Zankou: That's something I admire about you ladies. Always a clever remark at the face of danger. Though... I'm insulted. Don't you think I warrant the power of three?
Paige: Does he know where Piper is?
Phoebe: No. How would he know about her nail appointment?
Zankou: You'd think she'd be at Magic School attending to her husband.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, she didn't want to pay the cancellation fee for the nail appointment.
Zankou: You're lying. Somehow the power of two doesn't have the ring to it.
(Zankou waves his hands and the front doors fly open. His uses his power to push Phoebe and Paige out the door. They land hard on the porch. He waves his hands again and the doors slam shut.)
Phoebe: Now what?
[Cut to the attic. Dollhouse. Piper is finishing up stitching Leo's wound.]
Leo: Tie if off and cut it.
Piper: Scissors. (Leo hands her the scissors.) Aren't you happy you became a mortal?
Leo: At least now we can grow old together like every other couple.
Piper: That is, if we survive this. Wyatt's so worried, he practically locked us up and threw away the key.
Leo: I'll just have to prove to him that I can take care of myself and my family.
Piper: Yeah, it would help if we were reinstated to our former size. (They hear footsteps from outside. Piper looks out the window and sees Zankou and Craven.) What's he doing here?
Zankou: Post guards here and throughout the manor. As soon they find their sister, they'll be back. We need to fend them off as long as possible.
'Craven': If we're to find the Nexus?
Leo: The Nexus?
Piper: Where are Phoebe and Paige?
Zankou: I want more than to find the Nexus. I want to release the shadow. Harness its ultimate power.
Craven: Can you do that?
Zankou: Well, now that evil has taken over control of the manor, I can. And I will.
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Dollhouse.]
Piper: I've can't believe we've been miniature for two hours and demons take over the house. If Zankou taps into the Nexus...
Leo: We're not gonna let that happen.
Piper: Oh, yeah? How? We're three inches tall.
Leo: We're gonna get to the book and contact Phoebe and Paige.
Piper: Ah, that book? (She points out the window.) 'Cause A, we're trapped. And B, even if we weren't, those demons could squash us with one foot.
Leo: Stay calm.
Piper: Oh, now you're telling me.
Leo: Wyatt didn't put us in here to get hurt. He put us in here to protect us. There has to be something we're overlooking. Blasting doesn't work.
Piper: Yeah, I noticed.
Leo: All the doors, the windows are sealed. Listen, how did you play with the dollhouse when you were little?
Piper: What do you mean?
Leo: I mean, it's a toy, right?
Piper: I think you've lost a little too much blood.
Leo: No, listen to me. If it's a toy, it must open. The roof opens up or the doors swing open.
Piper: I don't know, that was a lot of years ago.
Leo: It might be our only shot. Think.
Piper: I think it swung open.
(They walk into a room.)
(Leo picks up a chair and smashes it against the wall. He uses a long piece of wood to try and pry open the wall. It doesn't budge.)
Leo: Damn it. Blast it.
Piper: Blasting doesn't work.
Leo: Well, maybe the force field only covers the windows and the doors. So, you know, do it.
(Piper winces as she blows up the wall. It comes apart enough for them to get out.)
Piper: Now what?
Leo: Follow me.
(They run outside.)
[Cut to Piper's room. Zankou is reading a diary. Craven walks in.]
Craven: I believe we've lo-...
Zankou: Do you have any idea how upset Piper was when her sister died?
Zankou: Listen to this. "Prue was always the strong one. Now that she's gone, I don't know if we'll have the strength to keep fighting for good. Or if it's even worth it."
Craven: Yes, well, if only-...
Zankou: Humans are slaves to their own emotions. And the strongest emotion is love. That's why Piper didn't leave her husband's side to fight. That was my miscalculation. They would go through hell to stay together. (Craven clears his throat.) What is it?
Craven: I believe we have found the Nexus.
[Scene: The Bay Mirror. Phoebe's Office. Phoebe is there working. Paige orbs in.]
Phoebe: Oh you've gotta give me one sec. Any luck with Piper?
Paige: No, I have scryed the entire universe and there's no sign of her. Will you please come back to Magic School with me now?
Phoebe: Give me just two minutes.
Paige: Our sister is missing.
Phoebe: And there are fifty jobs on the line if the paper doesn't come out.
Paige: You can cancel the subscription to our house if the demons don't get out.
Phoebe: Just give me one minute. (Phoebe walks out of her office and over to Man #1.) Okay. Check this out.
(She hands him a sheet of paper.)
Man #1: Do you think I'm gonna let "Ask Phoebe" rewrite me?
Phoebe: Read now, bitch later! Okay? (She walks over to another man.) So you oversold the space. Let me see the ads. Shrink 'em and print 'em both.
Man: We can't do that. Advertisers were promised a certain size.
Phoebe: Well, then, make the font bigger. And if they complain, send them a bottle of Crystal on my tab. Actually, on Elise's tab. (to Man #1) What do you think?
Man #1: It works.
Phoebe: That's what I like to hear. Who's next?
(The fashion editor approaches her.)
Fashion Editor: First, my teacup. Now he's on my computer.
Phoebe: You know what? Isn't this kind of obvious?
Fashion Editor: What?
Phoebe: He likes you. (They look over at the man sitting at his desk and the man winks. The fashion editor walks away.) Any other questions? No. Okay. I will be in my office, in a meeting. (Phoebe walks back into her office.) Can you believe those guys?
Paige: At least they're not pre-pubescent.
Phoebe: Paige, Piper, demons.
(They orb out.)
[Scene: Manor. Basement. Zankou, Craven and two demons are there. The demons have dug a large hole in the ground.]
Craven: Are you sure this is a good idea? The Nexus...
Zankou: The Nexus is neutral. Controlled by whomever controls the manor.
Craven: The shadow is the ultimate power. It could destroy us all.
Zankou: Well, then if I'm wrong, it's been a pleasure. (Zankou chants a spell. A dark cloud rises from the ground and devours the demons.) Good must still be present in the manor.
Craven: No, no, no. That's not possible. You expelled the witches yourself.
Zankou: Only two. That means the third one must still be here. That's probably what they came here for.
Craven: So, what do we do?
Zankou: We find her.
[Cut to the attic. Piper and Leo have climbed up onto the Book of Shadows.]
Leo: You okay?
Piper: My arms are a little sore, but I'm not the one with a hole in my back.
Leo: All right. Let's tweak the scrying spell so Phoebe and Paige know where we are.
Piper: Don't you think they've scryed already?
Leo: Well, if they did, it wouldn't have worked. Wyatt's shield on the dollhouse would have protected us. It must be the same reason Zankou didn't know where we are.
Piper: And now that we're out?
Leo: We have to hurry. All right, help me flip these pages.
Piper: Wait, I got a better idea.
Piper: Look out. (Piper blows up the edge of the book and the pages turn. The demons standing near the door look around the room.) You think they noticed?
Leo: I don't know.
Piper: Hope this works.
Leo: It has to.
[Scene: Magic School. Phoebe and Paige are making a potion.]
Paige: Okay, this whole calling a lost witch stuff is much harder without the book.
Phoebe: Maybe we didn't scry hard enough. Should we try again?
Paige: I told you it didn't work.
Phoebe: Okay! Okay, you know what? It says a pinch of rosemary, Paige. A pinch.
Paige: Sorry. I wasn't paying attention.
Phoebe: I'm glad to know the future of magic is in such good hands.
Paige: People have been telling me that a lot lately. (The scrying crystal floats into the air.) Oh my god. Are you seeing what I'm seeing?
Phoebe: Yeah, and I don't believe it.
(The crystal points to a place on the map.)
Paige: That's our house. Piper must be there.
Phoebe: Or it's a trap.
Paige: But scrying is witch-to-witch stuff. It has to be her.
Phoebe: Okay, but the house it crawling with demons. How are we gonna find her?
Paige: One way to find out.
Phoebe: Oh, God.
(Paige orbs out with Phoebe.)
[Cut to the manor. Bathroom. Phoebe and Paige orb in. Phoebe opens the door slightly and peeks out. A demon walks past.]
Phoebe: We gotta get past the guard.
Paige: We can't use anymore magic, otherwise Zankou will sense us.
Phoebe: Can't use magic? What do you call orbing?
Paige: Okay, fine. Then we won't use any more magic.
Phoebe: I have an idea.
[Cut to the kitchen. Zankou and Craven are there.]
Zankou: She's here. She's here. I know she's not alone. Speed the search. We've got company.
Craven: Yes, yes sir. But we may have already found Piper.
[Cut to the hallway. The demon walks past the bathroom and Phoebe kicks him in the head. He falls to the floor.]
Paige: Okay, that was a really great plan.
Phoebe: Well, I didn't use magic, did I? Where do we begin?
Paige: The book.
(They go up to the attic and knock another demon unconscious.)
Phoebe: Piper? Where are you?
(Zankou comes out from behind the door, holding a box.)
Zankou: Looking for these?
(He opens the lid and inside are a miniature Piper and Leo.)
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Continued from before. The tribe of demons have surrounded Phoebe and Paige.]
Zankou: The mighty Charmed Ones. The most famous witches of all time. So many demons have tried to kill you.
Piper: (from inside box) What do you see?
Leo: (from inside box) Demons.
Zankou: And now that the moment is here it's almost... anticlimactic.
Paige: Maybe for you it is.
(An energy ball appears in his hand.)
Zankou: Perhaps you would like to go first.
Phoebe: Hold on. You need us... to open the Nexus.
Zankou: Nice try. Shall I start with you instead?
Paige: No, because you need us to get the shadow.
(The energy ball disappears.)
Zankou: I'm listening.
Piper: (from inside box) What are they doing?
Demon: They're stalling.
Craven: Just kill them and evil will control the Nexus this time.
Paige: This time? What do you mean? You've tried before?
Phoebe: I bet they lost some demons too. Yeah, we've had some experience with the Nexus.
Craven: They're lying.
Zankou: No. I read Piper's diary. I guess I'll need to make her big again for you to do this.
Craven: Zankou. They just want you to restore the power of three.
Paige: But what's that compared to the power of the shadow?
Zankou: So what is in it for you?
Paige: We live to fight another day. And if we do die, we go down kicking and screaming.
Piper: (inside box) I'm not leaving you.
Leo: (from inside box) You have to.
Piper: (from inside box) If Zankou gets the shadow, then we'll never be able to stop him.
Leo: (from inside box) The shadow won't know where to go. Look, I might've lost my powers but I didn't lost what I know about magic. Trust me. Do what he wants.
(Zankou reaches into the box and pulls out Piper by her hair.)
Piper: Hey, put me down!
Zankou: You try anything...
Piper: Damn it, I said put me down!
Zankou: And you will lose the love of your life.
[Time lapse. Basement. Life-size Piper, Phoebe and Paige walk down the stairs. Zankou follows.]
Phoebe: Any idea how we're gonna get out of this one?
Piper: No, but I'm hoping Leo does.
(They stand around the hole in the ground.)
Zankou: Proceed. (He hands Paige a spell. The sisters say the spell and the shadow rises out of the hole.) What's happening?
(The shadow enters the box and Leo becomes life-size. The shadow has entered Leo.)
Zankou: What have you done?
(Leo pushes Zankou against the wall with a blast of black smoke. The demons throw their boomerangs at Leo but they harmlessly rebound off him. Leo throws Zankou onto the floor and vanquishes the demons with the blast of black smoke. Zankou throws an energy ball at Leo but it does not harm him. Leo blasts Zankou up the stairs.)
[Cut to the kitchen. Craven is there. Zankou lands hard on the floor. He stands up.]
Zankou: So close.
Craven: I told you we should have killed them.
(Zankou throws an energy ball at Craven and vanquishes him.)
Zankou: Never tell me "I told you so".
(Leo runs up the stairs. Zankou flames out. Piper, Phoebe and Paige walk up the stairs.)
Piper: Leo. Leo, you don't want this.
Leo: (deep voice) Say the spell.
Piper: "I am light, I am one too strong to fight..."
Piper, Phoebe, Paige: "So go away and leave my sight, and take with you this endless night."
(The shadow rises out of Leo. Leo collapses to the floor. The shadow goes back into the basement and back into the hole.)
Piper: Honey, are you okay?
(Leo groans and sits up.)
Leo: Yeah. I'm all right.
Paige: What happened?
Leo: The shadows couldn't choose between Zankou's evil or the power of three. So it went to the only neutral territory... me.
Piper: See, I told you it was a good thing you gave up your powers.
(They smile at each other.)
[Scene: P3. Collective Soul is performing on stage. The dance floor is crowded with people dancing. Piper, Phoebe, Paige and Leo are sitting on a couch at the back of the club.]
Piper: So, all that power surging through your veins didn't make you miss the old days?
Leo: No, I chose the girl. Remember?
Phoebe: It would be a shame not to put all that magical knowledge to good use.
(Paige sees Elise dancing.)
Paige: Oh my God. Isn't that your boss, Elise?
Phoebe: Oh my God, it is!
Paige: So much for her family emergency.
Phoebe: And she's with Richard Dillard.
Paige: Who's that?
Phoebe: That's the guy that should've been running the paper instead of me.
Paige: Well, if she's here, maybe she wants you to know that she does have a life outside work.
Phoebe: I guess. You know what? Good for her.
Piper: You're not gonna call her on it?
Phoebe: Well, I'm not gonna buy her a new BlackBerry, but all the times I've bailed, who can blame her?
Piper: Wow. Enlightened.
Phoebe: You learn a lot from walking in someone else's shoes.
Paige: Yeah, that's what I'm afraid of, what Zankou has found out about us.
Piper: Yeah, I don't think we've seen the last of him.
Leo: Well, on that unhappy note, I gotta get back to the manor and clean up the mess after the demons. It's probably gonna take a while to sort it all out.
Piper: Here we go again, huh?
(Leo leaves. Paige stands up.)
Paige: As for me, as much as I'd like to find a little cutie to dance with, I should be getting back to Magic School to finish those schedules. Woo hoo. Au revoir, adults.
[Scene: Magic School. Piper and Leo walk into the great hall. Piper is covering Leo's eyes. She uncovers them.]
Leo: What, you want me to clean Magic School?
(Phoebe and Paige walk in.)
Phoebe: No. We want you to run it.
Paige: Huh? What's going on here?
Phoebe: We were thinking since you're dying to try something new...
Leo: And Leo being perfect for the job. Considering your magic know-how you're practically a walking Book of Shadows.
Paige: Well, I have wanted to get out and spread my wings.
Piper: And with Leo, the school is still in good hands.
Leo: Well, I... I don't know what to say. Paige?
Paige: I'm good.
(Paige orbs out.)
Phoebe: Well, that was easy. Leo?
Leo: I'd be honoured.
Piper: Good choice.
(Piper kisses him. Leo sees Wyatt standing nearby. He goes over to him.)
Leo: Hi. Guess what? You don't have to worry about daddy anymore. 'Cause I'm gonna be okay. Okay?
(He picks Wyatt up and hugs him.)